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Gifts and what they say about you

23 October 2008

Thoughtful gifts can say good things about the giver. Thoughtless gifts can tell the recipient you're boring, lazy or lacking in imagination. Gifts that shout, "I have no idea what you like and couldn't be bothered to find out" tend not to be very endearing.

What do you want your gifts to say about you? And what do you NOT want them to say?
"I left it to the last minute again and this was all I could find" is not an attractive message. "I went to the trouble of choosing something that was exactly right for you" is far preferable.

If you want your gifts to show you really care about someone, take the trouble to check out their likes and dislikes and make sure you know whether they enjoy surprises or would rather have gifts they actually want. You might think you know exactly what gifts they like but do you really? Have you been buying your mum or your wife the same chocolates or perfume year after year because she loved it so much the first time? Are you sure she hasn't changed her tastes or still got the last three bottles tucked away in a drawer unopened? Maybe it's time to rethink your gifts.

For a best friend or partner, gifts that say "We have so much in common that I knew if I liked it you would" can be a powerful affirmation of your closeness (as long as the underlying message isn't "I bought this for you so I could borrow it"!). However, even if she is a football fan and wears the shirts as well as the trousers, a set of cufflinks boasting the messages "he always scored", thanks to his impressive tackle" probably won't make your girlfriend's day, or indeed your grandmother's.

It's so much easier now you can order all your gifts on line, rather than trudging round the shops, so why not spend the time saved making those gifts even more special and personal. Instead of just giving a nice photo frame or album, you might like to select and insert the photographs yourself or you can really go to town and get a canvas montage made up, complete with personalised poem. Alternatively you can have a favourite photo professionally printed on a wash bag.

If you want to get full marks for originality, choose a Picture Pocket Wash Bag, Make Up Bag or Pencil Case and either let the recipient select their own photos, pictures and postcards with which to adorn it or take the trouble to personalise it for them with images you know to be their favourites, mementos of special events or times and places of significance to both of you. These could make equally good gifts for teenagers, grandparents or anyone in between. There is also a transparent umbrella which works on the same principle with pockets (on the inside so they don't get wet) where you or the recipient can put favourite pictures or photos. If you are artistic you could even draw or paint the pictures yourself or make mini collages to insert. They can always take them out and replace them with their own if they think they're rubbish!

Talking of rubbish (and recycling and stuff like that) perhaps you want your gifts to express not just how much you care about the recipient but also how much you care about the world in which you both live. How about A Protect the Planet or Carbon Credit Gift Box? Or you can adopt a Polar Bear or a Penguin for your loved one. You get a polar bear or penguin soft toy along with the certificate, postcards and information. This is not the same as buying someone a "white elephant". Traditionally the King of Siam is reputed to have made gifts of white elephants to courtiers he wished to ruin as the revered creatures were expensive to keep and feed. Hence the term "white elephant" came to mean an unwanted gift. Don't worry, the recipient will not be personally responsible for feeding the penguin or polar bear for ever more; the cost of these gifts incorporate a one-off donation to an appropriate wildlife charity.

Of course if you want your Gifts to say something very specific that cannot be communicated through subtlety, you can choose from a variety of items on which to have your own personal message engraved. Or if you want to keep it simple, choose from a range of Gifts that quite literally say "I love you". If once is not enough, go for a calendar or diary that keeps saying it all year round with, "I love (their name)" incorporated into every picture.
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