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I saw mummy kissing Santa Claus

4 September 2008

Imagine that? I wonder what it must be like for any child to sneak downstairs during the night and see mummy kissing Santa Claus – would they be upset, or would they simply be amazed to see Santa – the 'real deal' – standing in their own home? What they probably wouldn't consider though is that the man they're mistaking for good old Santa Claus is – in all likelihood – daddy in disguise. Mummy isn't engaging in some illicit affair with the spirit of Christmas, but is instead giving the man in her life her own special romantic gift. Of course, there is also the question of why exactly he's dressed up as Santa Claus when the kids are in bed, but we can come to that later. Christmas is a time for loved-ones to express their true feelings for one another with romantic gifts – maybe even with a silver love heart sweet. Although now available in something a little more long lasting that sugar, these sweets are originally the creation of the same firm behind the ubiquitous Parma Violets, and are somewhat reminiscent of innocent schoolyard romances. One of the great things about these sweets is that the message changed with the flavour – which was always suggestive of fruit, but not quite that good – and perhaps even the colour, meaning that the object of your affections could have a new taste experience – not to mention a new romantic gift – that entirely suited either your mood, or their taste. And seeing as there was a whole packet of the things, you could say “I love you”, or “great lips”, or even “marry me”, as often as you wanted to. But fizzy sweets aren't the only way to let someone know how you feel – when it comes to confectionary, romantic christmas gifts can also come in the form of that last Rolo. Now available in hallmarked gold, one of the greatest symbols of love ever devised by a manufacturer of confectionary is essentially little more than chocolate and caramel. But to see this sweet in such an unromantic way is to undermine its true significance as a gift of love – after all, Rolo's are so delicious that you'd have to really love someone to give the last one away as a romantic gift. But romance and romantic gifts aren't all about confectionary, especially during the Christmas period. Indeed, if we consider the work of Edward Monkton – the author of an illustrated book on the loveliest of human emotions – love could be depicted by two dinosaurs - one of which is trapped in a cage of ice. The second dinosaur in the scene is so lovely that he or she is able to melt the cage, simply by thinking nice things and by using loving words. It just goes to show that love in its simplest of forms can be one of the most inspirational of all romantic gifts. But what about music? For anyone looking to give their feelings a melodic accompaniment, where better to look than Love Symbol? For fans of the artist formerly known as the artist formerly known as Prince, what could be a more romantic gift than the musical legend's tenth studio album. Who wouldn't want to listen to Sweet Baby on Christmas morning? And the lyrics to “I Wanna Melt with U” are enough to make anyone go weak at the knees. Of course, there's also Sexy M.F, but it's probably a good idea to wait until the kids have gone to bed before hitting play. But of course, all of these musings don't resolve the predicament of what to do if mummy is busted whilst kissing 'Santa' under the tree. Should the child's dreams be shattered by the news that Santa is in fact daddy, or should parents allow the mystery to continue? It's a tough question, and there are no easy answers. But then perhaps we should instead consider the question from another perspective. Exactly what is daddy doing dressing up as Santa when the kids are fast asleep in bed? Maybe that's his romantic gift to mummy.
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